“Monogamy? In This Economy?!” Robert Heinlein’s idea of group marriage as economic survival tool.
I did not come up with the above joke, but I read it on a bumper sticker and have been laughing for weeks.
For reasons that have nothing to do with rent prices in Seattle (heavens no!), I’ve been thinking more about the economics of non-monogamy.
I think that a lot of us grew up believing that if we partnered with another hard working human, we’d be able to afford a stable home with offspring and pets and vacations. But I’m not seeing much of those things occurring in my generation. Barely anyone I grew up with has children, I regularly see crowdfunding requests for pet care, and the only people I know who talk about trying to buy property are groups of 3 or more.
The model for stability that I grew up with - the nuclear family - doesn’t seem stable anymore.
Seeing this new normal makes me think about the book “The Moon is a Harsh Mistress” (1966) by Robert Heinlein. Set in a penal colony on the Moon, the story revolves around a repairman (Mannie) who is part of a ‘line marriage’ as he navigates some shenanigans with a self-aware computer and a sexy dame. In the story, marriages that involve more than two people are accepted as a rational reaction to the hardships humans face. The way that Heinlein writes about the potential stable unit several adults could form in adverse conditions left a mark in my and other readers’ minds. Heinlein is sited frequently as an inspiration in “Fifty Years of Polyamory in America” (2022, Olson and Brussel-Rogers), and as much as “The Expanse” co-author Daniel Abraham downplays it*, Heinlein’s ideas on families and interplanetary warfare are all over that series.
As a counselor who specializes in non-monogamous romantic partnerships in one of the most polyamory-friendly places in the world, I know I have a very specific ‘bubble’. But I do wonder if the economic vice-grip many of us find ourselves in could be a breakthrough for non-monogamous relationships. If your dream is a house and children, we might be nearing a time where banding together with a group of like-minded adults is the only way to realize your goal.
Late stage capitalism is a harsh mistress. Let’s keep all our options open.
Reference: https://screenrant.com/expanse-season-5-daniel-abraham-interview/